A well-chosen word will engage your audience, and allow you to communicate more effectively, and economically. This is an exciting prospect, so every week I pick, and ruminate about a normal, average word that I think is under-appreciated, this week’s word is BELIEF.
BELIEF is an umbrella word: it encompasses opinions, thoughts, hopes, fears, wishes and superstitions. A belief can come from experience, gossip, tradition, information or instinct.
It’s a conviction, an acceptance, a certainty. A belief can be inferred from another’s’ actions, or passed down from another generation. In polite conversation, it’s a way to differentiate another’s opinion from fact.
But at the end of the day, it’s a personal, internal entity that guides external actions.
Some realities may drive a belief, a belief is not necessarily tied to a result, or a reality, in many cases they just exist: Because the NY Giants won the last two Super Bowl matchups with the NE Patriots, one might be led to BELIEVE that Eli Manning is the best QB in football today. Unless one was from Boston, that is. Or Green Bay. Similarly, BELIEVING the health benefits of eating dark chocolate puts it on par with having a salad will not make it so, no matter how fervently I might believe it can.
Respecting the right to an individual’s belief system is part of MY belief system; but in business, remember: I am typically called into a job because someone’s belief is not working out so well: No, buyers will not be impressed by your vintage red flocked wallpaper…maybe lime green is the color to go for in PILLOWS, not the sofa….yes, spend the money to get a LICENSED electrician to install that new lighting….
BUT
What if I found out that their mom-who recently passed away-always loved red flocked wallpaper. Or perhaps they didn’t think lime green in pillows would add enough pop. Maybe their son’s friend is ‘handy’, and they don’t know the law, or how to say no?
Knowing, and understanding the ‘whys’ behind these beliefs allows you to understand the their actions, the first step to helping clients find solutions that will work.
A singular word can be very powerful. Doesn’t have to be extraordinary, either. There are SO many words available to us, sometimes we don’t hear them anymore. That’s one of the reasons I do this series, to focus on all that a single word can be. The word I’ve chosen this week is QUIET.
Instinctively, the first images that come to my mind are harried parents, or a library. Both cases admonishments, a forced condition. But today I’d like to ruminate about QUIET as A CONCIOUS CHOICE.
In a career-in a life-heck, in a WORLD where you get ahead by the number of connections, and degree to which you are connected to them all, QUIET would seem to be counter-productive. It’s hard to turn off the noise, and slowing down the flow of adreneline feels awkward.
Years ago I was having a conversation about meditation…actually, I was doing most of the listening, I just didn’t get it. Still remember the look on her face when I said based on her description, didn’t see any difference between that and sleeping!!
QUIET is a DISCIPLINE. Talk and activity fills time and space, and QUIET is about LISTENING, and BEING OPEN. Open to others, open to ideas, or just open to whatever is waiting in the wings, that you might not have noticed because your head was full of noise.
Professionally, I know I can get to the heart of the matter with someone sooner when I am quiet…people tell you the most amazing things when you let them!!
Sometimes quiet is confident, but sometimes it is fearful, but I think it is always about suspending your inner noise, and having trust or faith is someone, or something outside yourself. At the very least, QUIET brings me back to center.
It’s not an accident that this word came to me today, during this special, solemn and joyous shared holiday weekend of Passover and Easter.
In my personal life I am not a big joiner of group activities. Partially because my schedule doesn’t really permit it, but sometimes I just really like doing things myself.
One of my semi-annual rituals in recent years has been helping physically prepare my church building for the Easter and Christmas holidays. Now, because I’m a decorator, you might be thinking I’d be placing flowers and hanging wreaths and such. It’s be a logical guess, but it’d be wrong.
Father Tim works with Mary Ann and Catherine Amodio (of the most amazing third-generation Amodio’s Flower and Garden Shop fame) and their staff, to make the magic happen. Me? I vacuum after. YUP.
After the church is fully and beautifully decorated, I show up and vacuum. The mindless, repetitive motion, as well as the white noise of the vacuum clears my mind, while making conversation all but impossible. This ‘quiet’ time in this beautiful peaceful space takes me out of the stupid stuff every time.
IF you are observing anything this weekend, I wish you a glorious time of it. If you are not, may you find and enjoy some quiet on your own. And as always, thanks for reading.
People seem to remember more of what you say, and are even more interested in it. I love the sense of novelty, and the power words like this add, and this week’s word is FOLLY.
Heard at a to-the-trade forum at last week’s Architectural Digest Home Design Show; it came from Miles Redd, an NYC Interior Designer by way of Atlanta. The topic was the influence travel has on design, and since his most memorable trips were to England, it was a perfect word-I was immediatley transported.
Almost impossible to mumble or butcher the pronunciation, there is a crisp, yet light-hearted bounce to it.
As entertainment (Ice Follies, Folies Bergere) it’s a wink and a nod to the theatrical: the glamorous, the over the top, the silly and ridiculous-this was where Miles was coming from.
But it’s also an offhand disapproval; a dispassionate dismissal. A civilized, genteel-sounding put down, you’re humoring someone’s fantasy. It’s a noun, and defined as both silliness and foolishness, a lack of sense, understanding or foresight, even madness.
In mid-evil times, a Folly was an allegorical character in plays and artwork, a young man, usually looking like a Jester on tarot cards.
BONUS! It’s also a useless but showy, over-designed, highly decorative structure. Quite common in 18th century English gardens, on the grounds of many castles in Europe…and Westchester McMansions of the 1980s-HA!
What I really like about this word is that it’s a great way to register your opinion without it being a body-blow…in fact, it’d be a great choice when you have to disagree, and need to de-sensitize the situation as well. As in, it’d be pure folly to expect top dollar for your property without doing all you can to properly prepare it for sale.
The right word makes me hear things differently, and remember them better. That’s why I started this series, to bring words already on our radar screens into better focus. (Click here to see the others)
I was at a community meeting earlier this week, and the speaker used this word several times in describing a process of gettinggood things done, and it really resonated….so Word Of The Week is ALIGN.
It’s a verb in the truest sense, and most of the definitions are just as short and straightforward as you’d hope any process would be.
Essentially, it’s putting/arranging things into their correct order. Parts (components, PEOPLE! thoughts) are adjusted so the proper and best orientation (position, RELATIONSHIP! result)- is achieved.
It’s PROACTIVE. It looks at and considers all the elements, and the focus is on how they can WORK TOGETHER. Big, loud, or “tradition” does not figure in here, BIG-PICTURE and BALANCE does.
It COORDINATES different elements, many working parts of some sort. It’s a STRATEGY TO SUCCEED.
There is NO JUDGEMENT, just OBJECTIVE ASSESSMENT so a pre-determined GOAL or IDEAL is met.
When teeth are aligned, they-to their roots-brought to CENTER, to establish a solid foundation for long-term oral health. When wheels are aligned, they maintain the best contact with the road, and ensure optimum performance from the vehicle.
When people are invloved, there is TIMING and TRUST to consider. ALIGN CALMS and DE-SENSITIZES. It changes the focus. Same-league baseball rivals UNITE for the All-Star Game every July…more immediately for bragging rights, but bigger prize is home field advantage for the winning leagues’ team in the post-season.
The Refreshed Homes’ solutions for staging clients ALIGNwith comps, the Realtor’s pricing and marketing plan, the local market, and the sellers’ needs, goals resources and expectations.
ALIGN, for the most part FINDs A MIDDLE… but it is not weak, or compromised. STREGNTH comes from a conciously balanced core, where all energy is directed FORWARD.
Lastly, I think ALIGN involves CHOICE. At the end of the day, nothing is taken; a decision is made to do what it takes to move to the GREATER GOOD.
I like this word so much I could not wait until Saturday to share it! Have a great week, and see you next Saturday for a NEW Word Of The Week!
The Word Of The Week series came about because sometimes it is just so effective to have a different or unexpected word to say, or to have a refreshed meaning breathed into an old favorite.
This week’s word is CONFIDENCE.
Regular readers know I’ve had a lot of changes going on in my life lately…some circumstances, some people, some thinking processes. It created some doubt and uncertainty.
Confidence is the result of experience. It is sure, but not boastful or arrogant. You own confidence. It is cellular, not topical. It is willing to ask, and to try.
Confidence knows what it can do, but keeps its eyes open as well. There is an element of peace and self-acceptance in confidence. It’s very personal, it knows it is the best it can be. Often I ‘discover’ I have become confident about something in my life after the fact, when I speak or act differently than I have in the past.
Furthermore, confidence cannot occupy the same space as fear or anxiety.
In recent weeks have found confidence is a lot quieter than I used to think it was.
In fact, I think the more you have it, the less you have to talk about it.
I love the power of the right word.This series came about because time and time again I noticed how well the ’right’ word conveyed an economy of thought, while saving your from a bunch of wrong, and mediocre words. People seemed to ‘hear’ things differently-BETTER! It also clarifies and elevates things in my own mind.
The Word Of The Week is RE-CALIBRATE. From the verb CALIBRATE, it’s a powerful, and extraordinarily scientific word. It’s goal is PRECISION and ACCURACY. It is MEASURED and SPECIFIC; there is nothing casual or fleeting about it.
One web definition is ‘to make fine adjustments’, another is ‘ the act of checking or adjusting the accuracy of a measuring instrument’. My favorite-and most compelling is ‘ adjust (experimental results) to take external factors** into account or to allow comparison with other data’.
CALIBRATING involves HONEST APPRAISAL, then A GOAL. It looks at and evaluates all the elements, conscious that their WORKING TOGETHER , each at their peak, is critical to the SUCCESS of the whole.
All in all, you are acknowledging the need for change, and the desire to be the best. It is about moving forward, towards something bigger and better. By extension, RE-CALIBRATE means you are doing it again; it also signals your commitment to it being part of your long-term plan.
Usually there is a time-out involved. In the late 70′s and through a good part of the 80′s, the GM plant here in Tarrytown was pretty much round-the-clock, save for the occasional…well, they called it re-tooling. Things wore out. Changes and improvements were implemented to keep up with market demand and expectations. See where I’m going here?
Our brains are the new assembly lines.
My brain is the most valuable commodity I have access to. My business is not ‘small’. My thought process is every bit as precise, even mechanical as that assembly line.
Success in these times-for both my clients and my business-depend on the components of my business being just as finely attuned to each other as any well-made, manufactured, tangible product.
In the last few months, as the refreshed home entered it’s fifth year, I became increasingly enamored of this word. Encouraged by feedback and results, I am making changes to take me to the next level, everything from a new business vehicle, to updated marketing and websites and improvements.
I remind myself, as well as my clients that re-visiting, and further defining/refining is always uncharted territory, it can feel vague and uncertain. Factor in the afore-mentioned **external factors of this market, and OHYES, you’ve got real stomach-acid potential. BUT-with RE-CALIBRATION on our side, be reassured it is part of the process, and we will all be better for it.
Recently, the Words Of The Week have been principled, substantial words: Advocate, Ungapatchka, Trust, Ask, Engage…(click here to see them all) it’s time to mix it up, and have some smiles, so this weeks’ word is SWOON.
SWOON is fun to say. Try it in a normal tone, with a straight face. OK, now try it again. See what I mean? Can’t say it without engaging your whole face. Sometimes other parts, too. Sounds better that way.
The original meaning really surprised me: in the 13th century it was to faint, to lose consciousness; or to enter into a state of hysteria, or ecstatic rapture.
Back then,intense religion, superstitions, or things like bad living conditions, including poorly ventilated structures, voluminous and restrictive clothing of the time may have all had a hand in nudging excitement and emotion across the line to lightheaded-ness, and collapse. Imagine, what if a couple of too-tight corsets and some bad cod was really what got the ball rolling in Salem MA!
Today SWOON has a positive connotation. It’s demonstrative and emotional. A few steps beyond being happy, but not soover the top that you scare children.
Yes. A short burst of no strings attached, unconditionally HAPPY and EXCITED that leaves suspicion and cynicism at the door. For the moment, a SWOONER is totally engaged in being happy.
SWOONING makes you feel good. It’s also fun to watch a SWOONER; and best of all is to be SWOONED-UPON, or SWOONED-ABOUT. Maybe that should be the refreshed home’s new tag line, Prepare to Swoon?
I love how Google images puts current culture perspective on things. Search for SWOON and top of the page you get a Brooklyn street artist, a serious Kate Spade pump, various baked goods and lots of Twilight characters.
In design, you do your best to read the client. Taste is so subjective, but it is your job is to come up with something unexpected, that they will immediately love. HA! Think about that, almost as hard to do as saying SWOON with a straight face! But it happens, and I love it!
On this magnificent, light-filled February day, what is SWOON-WORTHY in your life?
Welcome back to Word Of The Week, where random thoughts are shared about a word that has resonated for me during the week. This week’s word is ADVOCATE.
From the early 1300′s, the Latin advacare to summon, to call to one’s aid; originally legal counsel. It’s a strong, substantial, grown-up word. Both a noun and a verb, it involves speaking for, and acting to protect the interests and welfare of another.
An advocate is CONFIDENT , and PRO-ACTIVE. They are more PASSIONATE than a spokesperson, and more LEADERSHIP-ORIENTED a supporter. It will takes doing a task well to a more personal, even on-going level. Advocates rarely punch a clock.
As an advocate for my clients, I navigate waters with contractors and vendors, even their in-laws and nosey neighbors!
Being an advocate is often part of the job, like your CPA handling funky notices from the IRS. Sometimes it is a directly paid position, usually in the government-like a consumer advocate. Politicians can advocate for a certain cause, that would be part of their platform; advocates that are paid to influence legislation are called LOBBYISTS.
Most advocates I believe, walk among us, unnoticed during everyday life. Everyday heros, they are volunteers who by their words and deeds help create, and support a better life for different segments of society. Every day of the week, volunteer EMTs and firefighters save lives, and property.
In our lifetime others have created events, images and organizations that have become institutions: think telethons and walk-a-thons; a library of colored ribbons, each with a cause; M.A.D.D, Special Olympics, and Susan G. Komen.
Advocate is a great word to show someone how much you care.
I love the right word. And I am absolutely crazy over this one. UNGAPATCHKA.
In fact, can’t believe I didn’t choose this for the inaugural word for this series.
One of my customers introduced it to me many years ago. Yiddish, it means exactly what it sounds like. Too much of anything, in an un-pleasing way. Inappropriate, over-the-top, not necessary. Even boring. Channeling Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart (while ruling on another matter), you know it when you see it.
Often done well, and entertaining in a specific time and place, it’s way outdated in another. We’ve all seen this done in different applications.
the refreshed home is all about getting things done in the most direct way possible, but prefers there to be some smiles along the way. ENJOY, but if these ring a little too true, we should talk soon.
First, SNL’s beloved Phil Hartman as a lovable chef with issues.
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Then this delightful clip, originally posted on a really funny blog, Jewish Humor Central pretty much nails it.
SO many words in our world! It’s easy to not hear them all, or just get in the habit of using the same ones.
Strong communication is one of the things that will get us noticed and understood in this world, one of the reasons for this series.
Every week, therefreshed home looks at a regular word we may take for granted, and gives it a moment in the limelight. This Word Of The Week is IMPROVISE.
From the Latin improvisus, meaning literally unseen, and the Italian improvvsio, meaning sudden, to be able to IMPROVISE is really quite a skill.
Unlike PLAN B, IMPROVISE is not a back-up.
It’s UNPLANNED, PRO-ACTIVE, and demonstrates LEADERSHIP. It arrives and takes action: ASSESSING, CREATING, DOING, and then GETTING ON WITHTHINGS.
IMPROVISE is FLEXIBLE, and CLEVER. It does not lose sight of the task at hand.
It is not perfection, but always goes for the BEST POSSIBLE RESULTS under the circumstances.
IMPROVISE‘s ditzy, less hands-on distant cousin is WINGING-IT.
IMPROVISE is NOT AT ALL PASSIVE, and much more VESTED IN THE RESULTS.
Because modern life is what it is, the unexpected happens to us all. Don’t “make do”-be sure to take full credit for IMPROVISING!!
Understanding how other people see things, what they find interesting and important is both enlightening and inspiring. Photography can tell you a lot about what anothers’ thoughts, so every so often I will troll through the free photo download sections on Flicka, and Dreamstime. Sometimes the titles are as compelling as the images.
I found this photo to be very provocative, have not been able to get it out of my mind. It’s called Deer, and Wolf Tracks inthe Snow. See how close the tracks are? TIMING here is a matter of life and death, probably for both parties.
TIMING works hard to be DELIBERATE, but there is still an unknown, a wild-card element that can play out in a number of different ways.
TIMING is not random. There is PLANNING; PRACTICE and VIGILANCE improves your odds of a favorable result, but there are NO GUARANTEES, either.
It’s what happens when your actions intersect with LUCK-or FATE…which I would suggest are two sides of the same coin, it depends on your PERSPECTIVE.
Sometimes we will just never know what could have been…I’m hoping that was the deers’ experience. But in the end, whether you’re looking for a parking space, telling a joke or THROWING A GAME-WINNING TOUCHDOWN PASS (Go, TOM!) I think it will always come down to just showing up, and doing the best you can, every time.
Welcome back to Word Of The Week, where random thoughts about the power of a single word are shared.
ASK is deceptively short and simple. ASK is about need, or want, but it’s not weak or needy. ASK is both DIRECT and PRO-ACTIVE.
Have you ever delayed asking, looking first for an indication of a YES? Or maybe not asked at all, because you thought you hinted enough?
Ann and Phil Faranda’s daughter, Catherine knows how to ask.
ASK shows your cards. Like many of the other featured words, there is a relationship in ASK. It feels close to the heart…sometimes, too close.
There can be a lot of pressure on ask. To ASK is to RISK….but what is the worst risk: to hear NO< or to miss out on an opportunity? I have a great quote on the wall behind my desk: “You miss 100% of the shots you never take.”
Sometimes doing a lot of asking puts things in perspective…kind of like job interviews, or dating. If you ask/date/interview rarely, EVERYTHING in the world seems to ride on that one event. But if you are ‘out there’ on a regular basis, a “no” doesn’t seem to hold that same power.
The best ASKS are clear and straightforward…just be sure to stop talking once you ask, so the other person can respond.
Finally, ASKING lets you know where you stand. It puts you in a position to clear away the old and move forward.
Lot of bantering about this word lately. It’s a word that is so universally understood, yet hard to define, and with many manifestations.
It feels strong and established, sturdy and dependable…yet still fluid.
Trust is not a manufactured modular house, created quickly, and dispassionately in parts that are trucked to and assembled on site. No, it is a stick-built home, that starts with the foundation, and is built up, upon that foundation, piece by piece. As in our relationships, each new piece rests on the integrity of what went before.
I think that’s why trust betrayed is so hurtful, you question everything that went before. But like a physical structure, if a part does fail, repair can make it stronger, but timeliness is urgent, so damage doesn’t grow.
It is not a solitary pursuit, it’s always about a RELATIONSHIP…even if you can’ trust yourself’ with, say cheesecake in the house (!!), you create another, evil, cheescake-snarfing bad-twin, because your sane self would know, and behave better.
Trust requires open and authentic communications, so LISTENING is important. To be trusted, you need to know what is important to the other side.
Implied is a suspension of belief, so there is also RISK in Trust. It is taking LOGIC as far as you can, then letting go. Ernest Hemmingway once said the only way to know if you can trust someone, is to trust them.
Little known fact: Regan’s famous ‘Trust, but verify’ comment to his Soviet counterpart actually came from a Russian parable that Lenin himself used to quote.
I have a number of random thoughts about TRUST, but one thing I know for sure, TRUST cannot occupy the same space where HURT, ANGER or FEAR exists.
Welcome back to Word Of The Week, where an image, and a new take on an known word has given pause for thought, and in this case, action. This weeks’ word is PIONEER, and comes to us all courtesy of Santa Fe Realtor, and online pal Emily Medvec.
We had a short online back and forth at the end of the year…the topic was new things for the new year, and I had a few things I wanted to bounce off her.
Was describing the collective consciousness of Staging in this area as ‘toddler’ , meaning a known entity, and with some motion, but not really defined or able to stand on it’s own. Emily-who came to Santa Fe a long time ago, by way of Connecticut-took it out of the juvenile, and said I had pioneer spirit to make what I wanted to happen.
OK-I didn’t CONCIOUSLY visualize myself in a ten-gallon hat or boots (I’m neither a hat or a boot person…but maybe I just never had the right boots…), or think- PUSH FORWARD TO NEW HORIZONS!!- but this word was rattling around in my subconscious.
The very next day there was a story on a local newscast that-TO ME-screamed opportunity for one of the things I wanted to accomplish…and immediately I trotted upstairs to shoot an email to the producers. What-if anything-will come from it-who knows? My point is that pioneer today is a state of mind. Further, we also each have our un-explored territories, just Google ‘images of pioneers’ to see what I mean.
Pioneer is basic and impactful. It feels more physical than it’s seemingly more intellectual cousin innovative. But it’s not in-you-face-forceful and proud of it like the modifier ‘guerilla’. It’s more solitary. In my mind it’s not getting by taking; it’s more proactive, getting by doing, or going where you want to, even if that means you need to make up the plan as you go along.
It is simultaneously curious, confident and humble. There is also uncertainty, so some bravery is involved… but it’s not putting your life in danger type of bravery. Because pioneer does not push up against anyone else: it’s you, challenging you to grow.
So-pardner-wishing you HAPPY TRAILS this week, and may the pioneer spirit be with you as you face whatever lies before you, and continue your journey to make 2012 your best year EVER!
Welcome back to Word Of The Week: where I explain why a certain word has caught my attention this week. Today the word is MANAGE.
When I first started my work life, I thought being a manager was a good aspiration…it seemed easy enough, you just tell people what you want them to do…did I mention I started work when I was very young??
ANYWAY
There are two types of takes on the word manage. One is an idiom for coping, or getting by…‘whatever happens, I’ll manage’…pretty passive.
The other is an all-encompassing Snugglie of a job description (not exactly sure what it does encompass, and very fluid boundries) that is much more pro-active.
Earliest roots come from the Italian ‘maneggiare’-to handle, especially as in horses, or French ‘manege’ -horsemanship. The Latin, of course is ‘manus’-hand, as in manual, manacle.
The parallels of directing the path of a large and powerful creature and overseeing all aspects of a project are intriguing; bringing both to their safe, complete and intended destination-even more so.
And NOW I might have a clue as to why John Maggiotto-the camera artist and photographer extroidinaire who took my professional head shots, and kindly allowed me the use of his artwork here-often uses horses as subject matter, and a wild stallion as his avatar on his business cards and stationary. But I digress….
The image of hands, used in several financial and insurance institutions, are meant to convey and assure personal safety and security, but it’s a reminder too of the very basic ways that things get done.
Managing is an absolute hands-on, up close and yes, sometimes personal endevor. Successful managers know there is give and take. There is a need to both listen, and the ability to take charge.
Sometimes you need a light touch, other times… not so much. It requires simultaneously living in the circumstances of the moment and looking/thinking ahead…often far ahead, and in all sorts of directions. There is responsibility, and should be mutual respect.
Lots of talk this week of what the future ‘holds’, and- for me, anyway-reflection of this past year. In times of economic uncertainty, there is reluctance to acknowledge or seek the value of the intangible; so many perceive value to lie solely in the lowest dollar figure, or the finished-visual-product.
Ours is a world where little is simple…sometimes by evolution, sometimes by design. Relying on someone else who is very smart about something is not a bad thing. I will continue to make how I manage projects, and the process for clients my highest priority. And I will continue to also learn how to do it better.
I thank the readers, and clients of the refreshed home for a challenging, and rewarding 2011. I appreciate your faith and trust this year, have enjoyed sharing your excitment as your projects have unfolded, and look forward to the opportunities the New Year will bring us all.
Because of some projects and several conversations this week I actually had another word ready to go today, but it just didn’t feel right for this Saturday, Christmas Eve.
“Grace” has several definitions, and all of them good. As a noun it’s a physical condition of elegance. As a verb, it adorns and embellishes. I read that is is mentioned 170 times in the Bible, and that one definition is that it is unmerited favor.
I am a person of faith…not just mine, but others’ faith as well, and I really love that last definition. If we are connected to the moment, I think we can find grace through the smile of a stranger, or another driver letting us go in front of them.
I don’t think it’s showy or loud, but it’s not small, either. I believe grace is goodness, and that it’s always around us, it doesn’t exist just when we see it…or remember to be grateful for it.
In my mind, I see and feel grace as an all-encompassing warm glow. It’s a gift, reassurance that big-picture, I am being looked after, and all will be OK.
What I call grace transcends all the demographics.
There has got to be other words to describe this in other faiths and cultures, I just don’t know what they are. What are your word(s), and how do you define them?
Meanwhile, wishing you the realization of how much goodness and light surrounds you, 24/7.
This is a very interesting word for me. Like the others, it has depth and is nuanced, and I think this might even be a theme for 2012.
First, it’s an action word.(YAY for action!)
Second, it’s an interactive action-you can’t ‘engage’ by yourself, you need someone else to engage with.
Third, it implies mutual benefit and interest. Sure, one person has to start it, but it continues because it’s a choice.
Fourth, it has a nice, light and balanced touch. Nothing hard-sell, or one-sided. It’s about attraction, not persuasion.
All these things bode really well for the new year. In the last few months, I have seen smart and strong people regain their voice, and their confidence. Sanity has started to return to the market, as well as civility.
By and large, we have been collectively coming from a place of fear in the last few years, it’s great to see people coming out of it-no matter how tentatively-choosing to move on with their lives. I’m very excited about what the new year will bring.
In her 2006 book, What I Know Now: Letters to My Younger Self, Ellyn Spragins coaxed forty-one notable women from all walks of life to write a letter to their younger self, and share with them wisdom and insights they know they could have used at the time.
Olympia Dukakis wrote to the woman she was in her 30′s: an actor working at making a living, an actor working to organize/run a community theater, mother, and wife to a man who was seriously ill. Everything, every singlemoment about her life at that point was about work, and duty.
In her letter she counsels the younger Olympia that “You will come to understand that by purposefully capturing happy moments you expand the soul”.
I don’t think I ever thought about that word before I read that book, but it’s been a beacon to me since. I especially love it this time of year, when tallying up the past 11 months, and looking to the future.
Purposeful is not forceful, or rushed. It’s not regretful, judgemental, or hurrying to make up for lost time.
Purposeful is thoughtful that did its homework, and met up with some confidence and commitment along the way. Purposeful has made a decision, and is about moving forward.
What I really love about this anecdote is the quiet backstory: in not so many words, young Olympia is being gently urged to at least re-think, if not move out of her comfort zone (worrying, working, busy), perhaps re-consider think what is instinct or reflex, and have a little faith-all in pursuit of a larger, better goal. Like I said, my beacon.
Anyone who has, or is responsible for anything of value knows the word.
Both a noun and a verb, it’s a complete and unblinking account or listing of what exists, tangibles, even intangibles. It’s a frozen moment in time, usually done because of some greater, larger value.
Whether you are 8 years old and doing a daily check of your Halloween candy-as a precaution against marauding older siblings, a person in recovery looking to stay that way, or a businessperson needing to balance their books, it’s a tool to base further actions on.
As we are rocketing to another new year, it’s a big topic of conversation. Having a clean slate and a plan in place for the new year is an attractive thought, but it can feel like a daunting task to look back and honestly, thoroughly enumerate our actions-or inactions, and the results. Here are a few things that many years in retail taught me to get started, and get through it:
Listing/recording is all it is. There is no critical analysis, guilt, or judgement, in the proces of inventory.
Whatever is, “IS”. You can’t re-write history, but you can learn from it. And sort of a Darwin-ian corollary, if there are aspirations to continue-grow-even thrive-you need need to first know all of what “IS”.
It’s rarely as bad as you think it is. The guilt/procrastination is the worst.
You can’t do anything genuinely productive until you really know what “IS”
SURPRISE! A solid inventory also reminds you of all the good and positive things.
As a store manager, it was lots of paperwork before, then after, to reconcile. As a human being hoping to keep evolving into the best person I can be, it means revisiting those too-flip comments that hang heavy in the air, hours later. Since the refreshed home carries little physical inventory, professionally it means asking other trusted professionals for their opinions, and their feedback
If you have read this far, chances are good that bettering yourself is one of your goals as well. ALSO-that there is a fair amount of ”good stuff” that you have long forgotten, or taken for granted.
No matter if it’s for personal or professional reasons, taking an inventory is not just a great way to start the new year, it’s an even better way to wrap up the current one. Take a deep breath, you’ll be fine.
